Because of You

Because of you, I chose not to leave but to keep on guard.

Because of you, I chose to forget my desires.

Because of you, I chose life's simple cravings.
But most of all,
despite your dilemma
I realized.....

 Someone out there really cares.

A Week to Remember

Research

Mind-blowing, Braindrain

Search, Discuss, Deliberate

Eager, Interesting, Satisfying, Meaningful

Rest, Eat, Celebrate

Exciting, Refreshing

Holiday

My Anguish and Gratitude to the Sea

To Aphrodite: Don't weep on losing Poseidon. Zeus might be waiting somewhere.

You came into my life unexpectedly

Though in doubt, I helped you see

That a woman with standard like me

Gave a chance to a man like thee.

My heart, my trust I gave it to you.

Yet instead of rainbows, you painted me blue.

From no where you believed on words 

Not even the dead could confirm.

You're a coward.

You're never a reward.

You're a woman underneath.

You're a child easily deceived.

I wish to curse you. 

Feel my pain and my anguish

Until you ran out of breath

Carrying my wrath.

But I never did.

I just wish you can find

A piece of your little nutshell in the ocean

Your balls and your guts so, you could be a man.

You broke my heart, I know.

But I'm thankful for saving me

From sorrow

And from drowning to the sea.

I once was happy

And will always be.

Forget Me Not

I want to share an excerpt of the wonderful message of Dieter Uchtdorf, Second Counselor  in the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saint. I am not perfect, and every time  I try to walk on the path of righteousness, I sometimes lose the track.This has been a good instrument for my self-reflection and may you learn something from it too.

"I’m not exactly sure why this tiny flower has meant so much to me over the years. It does not attract immediate attention; it is easy to overlook among larger and more vibrant flowers; yet it is just as beautiful, with its rich color that mirrors that of the bluest skies—perhaps this is one reason why I like it so much.

The five petals of the little forget-me-not flower prompt me to consider five things we would be wise never to forget.

First, forget not to be patient with yourself.

In the meantime, be thankful for all the small successes in your home, your family relationships, your education and livelihood, your Church participation and personal improvement. Like the forget-me-nots, these successes may seem tiny to you and they may go unnoticed by others, but God notices them and they are not small to Him. If you consider success to be only the most perfect rose or dazzling orchid, you may miss some of life’s sweetest experiences.

Second, forget not the difference between a good sacrifice and a foolish sacrifice.

We can ask ourselves, “Am I committing my time and energies to the things that matter most?” There are so many good things to do, but we can’t do all of them. Our Heavenly Father is most pleased when we sacrifice something good for something far greater with an eternal perspective. Sometimes, that may even mean nurturing small but beautiful forget-me-not flowers instead of a large garden of exotic blooms.

Third, forget not to be happy now.

So many people today are waiting for their own golden ticket—the ticket that they believe holds the key to the happiness they have always dreamed about. For some, the golden ticket may be a perfect marriage; for others, a magazine-cover home or perhaps freedom from stress or worry.

There is nothing wrong with righteous yearnings—we hope and seek after things that are “virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy.”⁴ The problem comes when we put our happiness on hold as we wait for some future event—our golden ticket—to appear.

 If we spend our days waiting for fabulous roses, we could miss the beauty and wonder of the tiny forget-me-nots that are all around us.

This is not to say that we should abandon hope or temper our goals. Never stop striving for the best that is within you. Never stop hoping for all of the righteous desires of your heart. But don’t close your eyes and hearts to the simple and elegant beauties of each day’s ordinary moments that make up a rich, well-lived life.

Fourth, forget not the “why” of the gospel.

We focus on what the Lord wants us to do and how we might do it, but we sometimes forget why.

My dear sisters, the gospel of Jesus Christ is not an obligation; it is a pathway, marked by our loving Father in Heaven, leading to happiness and peace in this life and glory and inexpressible 


fulfillment in the life to come.

Fifth, forget not that the Lord loves you.

As a child, when I would look at the little forget-me-nots, I sometimes felt a little like that flower—


small and insignificant. I wondered if I would be forgotten by my family or by my Heavenly Father.

Years later I can look back on that young boy with tenderness and compassion. And I do know 


now—I was never forgotten.

You are not forgotten.

Wherever you are, whatever your circumstances may be, you are not forgotten. No matter how 


dark your days may seem, no matter how insignificant you may feel, no matter how 


overshadowed you think you may be, your Heavenly Father has not forgotten you. In fact, He 


loves you with an infinite love."

Be Prepared

The flood on the nearby provinces of Bangkok is really alarming. Floods has caused a high death rate. While people  in Ayuthaya and Lopburi are crying on how to save their lives, people here in BKK have started panicking as the prime Minister announced that flood might occur anytime next week. 

"Do you think prune juice is good for my tummy?"

Upon reading the news, I and Pangs  decided to go to supermarket and prepare for the 72-hour kit as advised by the church. While Dylan was so excited on his first pushcart ride, I and hubby were surprised on the massive attack of consumers trying to grab as many bottled waters, canned goods, and rice in the rack. Wow, panic-buying mode!

C'mon guys let's have some joyride! 

We're glad that despite the "chaos" in Tesco Lotus, we're able to buy the things we needed.   

Daddy, can you give me some, please.

Smells yummy.

Keep the Faith

Was there a point in your life when you wanted to give up? When you believed that you gave your best but it was useless to some? Was there a point in your life when you uttered the word I QUIT? When despite your best efforts you remained unnoticed? Was there an instance when you just stopped hoping? When despite walking so many miles, you’ve never reached the end of the road? When after heartfelt prayers, they remained unanswered?

Kristine in Aussie.

Hubby in Assumption.

I dare say do not quit. Keep on walking, even if you lose your shoes. Even if you’re barefooted, walk. When you can’t reach the apple, keep jumping. If you still can’t get a ladder and climb. Sometimes, the things we want may be hard to get, dreams may be impossible to achieve, and wishes may never come true. But as long as we breathe and as long as we have something to hold on, even if it’s just a strand of hair, hang on.

Big Bro in his police uniform.

Mudra and Kat's first overseas tour

Abeng's tour in Macau.

We lost our house. My parents stopped working full time. I used to stop studying in college, and so was my brother. We stopped living the lifestyle we used to have. My sisters stopped dreaming, and so was my husband. Everything has stopped. We thought our life has ended there, for we were there for quite a long time.

But the wheel of life started to roll again slowly but surely. We lost the house but not the home.  We lost almost everything but not our family. We stopped wishing for the impossible but we never stop hoping and praying. We only had one strand of hair to hang on, and we are still hanging on, one strand of hair which is strengthened by our faith to HIM.

My family who has faced many trials but has remained firm and faithful.

“Don’t you quit. You keep walking. You keep trying. There is help and happiness ahead. Some blessings come soon. Some come late. And some don’t come till heaven. But for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come. It will be all right in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come.”     -Jeffrey Holland – Mormon Messages

Six Months and Counting

Seven months ago, my tummy is beyond tape measure's reach. I was so frustrated that I couldn't wear some of my dresses but at the same time I was so excited of seeing my baby. I took  an earlier leave from work just to make sure I have enough rest before my delivery.

While my due date was getting nearer, most of my friends asked me about my angel. I felt frustrated when  I expected him to arrive on my dute date but  there was no signs of labor. The anxiety lasted for some days. On my mother's birthday, February 10, I felt like I was having some back pain and I remembered I was complaining it to my mom while having some chat with her. At the wee hours  I felt my water bag broke and I visited the toilet for the nth time. That was the first time I saw my husband danced without a tune. He was moving to and fro as if he was the one who's gonna deliver the baby. When Sam, our dear friend, came into our room, he acted as he would scold me when I said, "Wait, I have to put some lipstick first." hahahaha

While I was at the delivery room, Pangs and Sam couldn't stay in one place. I even heard them arguing with some nurses reminding them to take good care of me. I was so grateful that Sam accompanied my husband that time.

The labor was so terrible. I thought I was gonna die. Everytime the baby kicked, I was running out of breath. My heart began to palpitate faster and I became so nervous. I asked the nurses to talk to me, but the only phrases they could say are "please wait, please realax, and doctor near."

When my doctor arrived, he saw how I suffered with the labor and I even said, "Talk to me or   I'll gonna faint." That was the time he asked my husband to join me in the delivery room. I thought pushing the baby out was like doing the hardest  s*** I could ever have but I was wrong. Dylan did not go out easily and when my husband saw him coming in and out, he said he's gonna faint. That was the moment I gave my last push, with the nurses and my husband's full force support.

Now Dylan Thairone Felix-Aguelo is six months old and he  grows so fast. It seems that he was like a newborn yesterday. Six months ago, he was so fragile. I was even afraid to breastfeed him. Now, he rolls over our bed, makes some push-ups, and giggles. His laughters are our medicine from loneliness, frustration, and boredom. Dylan completes our family.